I Don’t Know What To Say

A friend of mine died yesterday.

I had not known Jeff very long, but he was one of the first people I met in Madison and he was one of my favorite coworkers. Jeff was one of those jolly people who is a delight to talk with and be around. He was so laid-back, so level-headed and so much fun that I really looked forward to chatting with him every day.

I don’t know how he died yet, no one does, and I don’t know Marie (who was Jeff’s partner) well enough to call and ask her. I opened my email this afternoon, just now actually, and found an announcement from my boss regarding Jeff’s passing away. I don’t know, I’m confused by the intensity of my reaction. On the one hand, I’ve only known Jeff a couple months, why is this affecting me so much? But then again, Jeff was someone special and even in the short time I have known him I can tell that he had the magical ability to touch anyone he met.

It is so strange, when I saw him just this last Friday, he seemed healthy and happy. He was laughing and joking around and even biked home from work. He was only in his early 40’s. I just don’t understand what happened, and there probably won’t be any more information until at least tomorrow.

I keep thinking that it is just some sick joke, that I’ll get another email saying, “Only kidding!” or a call telling me it was a false alarm, but I know that’s not going to happen. It’s real, and he’s gone.

I am sorry, I am just starting to ramble now, but I will miss him. I’ll post more when I know more and can think about this in a centered fashion.